Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Shaking the Dust Off.

WOW it has been over two years since I posted.

I think I had given it up.  My life has been bonkers for two years.  It's still bonkers, but I think I'm pretty used to the bonkers now.

For anyone out there who is either new to this little blog or who has simply forgotten who I am due to time or the fact that nothing I was writing about was earth-shattering anyway, a brief recap:  I was a stay-at-home mom to two darling boys, happily married to my man.  I call the kiddos A (the firstborn-now 14) and J (the baby-now 13) for really dumb reasons considering pretty much everyone who reads this knows me or will probably never meet me, and the hubby is called just hubby.  I started writing this blog as a form of therapy.  I had been doing my thing for several years, and I think I needed an outlet, a way to express myself and hopefully find some like-minded folk out there who would help me convince myself that I wasn't completely nuts.  That was the beginning.  And then I just started writing a LOT when my dad was really sick, and it grew from there.

People have been so kind who have read my posts, and have helped me through some tough situations.  It really did help me while I was writing to have that outlet, I felt like I had a little community, like not only was I not alone in my head, but almost everyone I know has very similar struggles.  So it grew, and I kept writing.  I'd have times when I wrote less and times when I wrote more.

But then I stopped.

I think I stopped for several reasons.  Time crunched as my kids were growing older and getting involved in more activities.  I thought I didn't have anything else important left to say.  I was annoying myself.  And there was a funny feeling when I'd talk to people who I knew were reading my posts that they knew so much more about me than I knew about them.  And it sort of freaked me out.

So here I am.  I have decided it's ok if you know me better than I know you, although I'd LOVE to get to know you better.  Back at my (new) computer with a glass of wine, typing again.  I don't have time to do this.  I am AT THIS SECOND feeling guilty that the kitchen is a mess, the laundry isn't caught up, there is dog hair EVERYWHERE and A is eating a tortilla and cheese roll up (that he made) up in his room for dinner as he watches probably episode 14,594 of The Office.  I'm splurging because I have a couple free hours where the hubby has taken J to football practice and I am--gasp--staying home.  Here's the thing:  I have missed this.  I think I have needed this.  SO much has happened since we were last together, dear readers, that I'm going to have to put it out there in chunks, or I fear I will lose you.  You are my community, we are each other's therapists.  So baby steps it shall be.

Let me just say that much has changed.  A is now a freshman in high school.  Gulp.  J is in his last year of middle school.  Parenting kids this age is a WHOLE NEW BALLGAME and there are barely any mommy blogs out there about it.  So sorry, folks, but if you're looking for one, you're stuck with me and very few others.  I'll do my best.  Hubby is still an air traffic controller, but will hopefully be retiring very soon.  We seriously don't have time for him to have a job right now.  Did I just say that? Oh and I HAVE A JOB!  I'm actually getting paid to do a job.  Not much, mind you, not nearly enough for what I do, but holy crap I cannot tell you how much it means to me.

I am a "Special Education Paraprofessional" in our school district.  Like lots of moms my age.  That's a fancy name for teacher's aide.  In many ways, it's a cake job that I'm unbelievably lucky to have landed.  School hours, off during the summers (unless you choose to work summer school which I have), off whenever school is off.  Seriously could not be better.  That's how they justify the horrible hourly wage, I'm sure.

But my position is especially special, in my humble opinion.  I was very honored to be selected to work in the elementary DCDS room in our district.  I work full time with kiddos who have severe developmental or cognitive delays.  Which means none of the students in my room are verbal and I deal with lots of wheelchairs and adaptive equipment along with their angel faces all day.  And people, WHO KNEW???  This is totally my calling.  I wish I could go back in time and tell a younger me that this is what I needed to do, because I should have started this years ago!  I am currently in my second full-time year after doing a full year of subbing for the room.  I'll go on and on about this gig, carefully, so I need you all to know this is what I'm referring to when I talk about my job.

Other than the new job, things are just busy and silly here at the Suburban Farmhouse.  A and J are still playing baseball in the summer, hubby is still coaching.  J is still playing football, and hubby is coaching that as well.  A is now on the high school Trapshooting team, which is super cool, and hubby is (phew!) not coaching that.  Happy the Dog is still happy, lazy, chasing the ever-evasive squirrels, and getting chubby.  I'm working, momming, wifing, laundrying (yikes spellcheck does not like my words), mowing, loving my dog, TRYING to get together occasionally with friends, and trying to figure out how to schedule a damn mammogram.  That's the Christmas Card summary.  I'll dive into WAY deeper stuff in coming posts.  My darlings, I have so much to share with you.  This first post back has been a boring one at best, but bear with me.  I'm rusty, but I am happy to be here, and I hope you're all happy to see me.  Please do stay tuned.  XOXO


  1. Yay! I'm so glad you're posting again. And that picture is so cute!!